Monthly Archives: January 2013

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Charlie’s Quotes (or Monkey News)

Me and Charlie were watching/listening to this¬†Youtube video of some of Karl Pilkington’s stupidest moments last night, and when we got to the part about the infinite typewriting monkeys; Charlie decided to transmogrify into a female Karl and start saying how she didn’t think they could knock up the complete works of Shakespeare.

I decided to try and explain that as there are a finite number of characters used in a book, and therefore a finite number of combinations in which those characters can be placed; it’s a mathematical certainty that given an infinite number of monkeys, at least one would hit the correct combination to produce Shakespeare. Charlie responded with this:

“But what if he slips and lands on the ‘Z’?”

Once I had regained my breath and wiped the tears of laughter from my eyes I decided to try a different tack and explained that it didn’t have to be infinite monkeys, but that it could be a single monkey with an infinite amount of time, and somewhere in there you would get the correct character combination. Charlie again responded:

“Aww, that poor monkey, he’d be really tired!”

When someone is pitying a hypothetically immortal monkey its definitely time to give up.

I thought this picture would be funny, but now I'm just disturbed.

I thought this picture would be funny, but now I’m just disturbed.

Charlie’s Quotes – You Cats…

As I was brushing my teeth this morning, Charlie’s voice drifted up the stairs:

“You cats are such pricks sometimes!”

Needless to say the mirror got covered in toothpaste.


We had a massive downpour of snow in the night and this morning Charlie called up from downstairs as I was shaving:

“The snow has broken the sky!”

“What?!” I shouted as I looked out the window to try and see whatever Aurora Borealis-esque crazy shit she was referring to, wondering what the hell was going on.

“Yeah, there’s no TV signal!”


What I expected to see, but obviously with more snow

What I expected to see, but obviously with more snow

What I actually saw. Boring!

What I actually saw. Boring!

For non-UK residents, an explanation – Sky is the name of a popular satellite television subscription service. Other services are available.